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*****
Klaus raised his head and looked into Dorian's eyes.
He knew who he was now, and who this man was sitting beside him - the bane of his existence, who now knew his greatest shame.
Who was looking back at him with love and compassion, not condemnation or pity. Who continued to hold his hand, firmly, not repelled by his touch even after the awful revelation that, just as his father had spent the war deliberately blind to Nazi atrocities, Klaus had spent his life deliberately blind to his father's party association.
Along with all the memories of his life, Klaus remembered the past few days with utter clarity. He had drawn all the wrong conclusions about their relationship, and tormented Dorian by dangling before him exactly what he had always claimed he wanted.
And for the second time!
Now he knew that his memory of the two of them naked together was true as far as it went - but they had not been making love. Rather, Dorian was helping him to fake it, in order to keep him from being raped.
Klaus burned with shame. I am a complete hypocrite.
"Klaus," Dorian said softly, "whatever your father may have done, it doesn't change who you are. I wish you could talk with him about it. He can't help but be proud of the man you have become."
"I can never be good enough - never be what he wants."
"You shouldn't have to be what he wants! Why should you have to make up for his bad decisions? You are a good man - he has no right to ask more. I have a good mind to find him and give him a piece of my mind!"
Was there anyone else in the world who would defend Klaus so? "You would do it, wouldn't you? You would stand up to my father the way you always stand up to me."
Dorian started to say something -- then stopped, drawing in his breath. The wide blue eyes studied Klaus's face. "Are you remembering ... ?"
Klaus nodded. "I remember it all now. I know who you are ... Eroica."
Using their clasped hands, he pulled Dorian to him and kissed his soft lips.
The thief drew back, startled, wary.
Klaus was puzzled. "I thought you wanted me to kiss you."
"I do." The wide blue eyes were very serious, determined. "But I only want it if it's what you want."
Klaus felt himself smile, an unfamiliar sensation. He did want to kiss Dorian. He remembered denying it for years, ruthlessly suppressing the memories that had dared come in snatches of dreams of the few times he had been held in Dorian's arms, kissed by Dorian's lips.
But not during his amnesia. Given the perfect opportunity, the thief had never once taken advantage of Klaus's vulnerability.
Now I know what I am, what I want. I will not be blind to it any longer, no matter the cost.
Again he pulled Eroica to him, this time wrapping him in his arms so he could not escape, and indulged himself in the sweet mouth as he had so longed to do these past few days when he had had no memory of being Iron Klaus, no hypocrisy to mask his desires. A man of action, not words, he poured all his n ewly-acknowledged passion for the golden thief into the kiss.
Dorian responded tentatively at first, as if he were afraid Klaus was still not truly in his right mind -- but when the kiss deepened, suddenly the thief went limp in his arms.
A moment later, though, the blue eyes opened. Dorian smiled up at Klaus, murmuring, "I didn't know there was anyone in the world who could make me faint from a kiss!"
The Dorian Klaus found most annoying was back.
Klaus shook him. "Stop that foppish nonsense!"
"But, darling -- "
"I said stop it! You are a man -- act like one!"
Klaus saw sadness descend on the beautiful features, as Dorian tried to extricate himself from Klaus's grip.
But Klaus would not let go. He had to make the man understand things he only newly understood himself. "Dorian -- look at me," he demanded.
Dorian looked at him as if he expected to be hit. What have I done to him? How can I let him know how much I want him?
"I do not want a fop or a fool," Klaus explained carefully. "That is a pose. God knows I have hidden behind my own pose for long enough -- but between you and me, Dorian, no more poses, no more hypocrisy. I know who you really are. The real Dorian Red Gloria is the man who saved my life and cared for me these past days, the man who is not afraid to snatch a bomb from a crowded conference, to face down the KGB, to ... stand up to me."
Dorian stared up at him, clearly not believing what he was hearing -- or not processing it. "Do you ... want me?" he whispered at last.
"Ja -- but not acting like a foolish woman! You do not have to act effeminate -- why have you never seen that when you put on that pose, it turns me most away from you?"
Dorian frowned. "Exactly what do you object to?"
Klaus sought for a way to explain. "The way you dress, especially when you wear women's clothing. That hair!"
"Would you like me better if I cut my hair? I'll do it for you, Klaus."
The offer was made without thought, without bargaining -- just I'll do it for you. Klaus felt his heart catch in his throat, and raised one hand to clutch at the golden curls. It would be desecration to cut that beautiful hair.
"No," he whispered, his full voice lost for the moment. "It isn't your hair -- it's -- " He found himself at a loss.
But Dorian said, "I understand." He smiled. "You don't like it when I swish."
" ... swish?"
"Act obviously gay. And you're right -- it is a pose. I don't have to assume that pose with you."
For reasons he did not fully understand, Klaus felt guilty. "I have no right to try to change you, Dorian."
The smile widened. "It's too late for that, my darling. You began changing me the moment we met."
And Klaus realized that he, too, had changed, slowly but inexorably, under the thief's influence. He didn't know how to put it into words, though, so he pulled Dorian close and wrapped his arms around him again, kissed that welcoming mouth once more, and gave himself over to his fate.
#
Dorian exulted in the sweet, demanding kisses Klaus gave him, in the feel of the Major's hands exploring his body, tracing his shoulders, his arms, his back.
Then Klaus began unbuttoning his shirt and helping him out of it.
They stripped each other, Dorian free at last to feast his eyes on Klaus's strong, sculpted body, to delight in the way his love looked at him. At last they stood naked, clasped together the length of their bodies, drawing each other's warmth as they kissed yet again.
Klaus showed no interest in lifting Dorian, and although Dorian had learned recently that he could lift Klaus, it was not with grace but with unromantic effort -- he could not sweep his lover off his feet, nor did he think Klaus would accept it if he could.
So Dorian turned to the sleeping bags that lay side by side, spread one of them wide open, and opened the other to pull over them when their bodies inevitably cooled.
"You have done this before," Klaus commented as Dorian guided him down to the cavern floor.
"Not for a very long time," said Dorian, "and never with anyone I loved as I love you." He looked up at Klaus through his lashes. "I hope you don't mind that before I knew you existed, there were others."
"Don't," Klaus reprimanded gently, turning Dorian's face fully up to his. "It is a good thing that one of us knows what he is doing."
Dorian laughed. "Trust me to fall for the least romantic man in the world." He pushed Klaus down and straddled him.
Klaus laughed in return, but there was irony in it. "You see me now and think I am not romantic?"
"Dar- Love," he said, finding an endearment he used with no one else, "you are full of healthy lust, which is far more fun than romance!"
And he proceeded to drive Klaus mad with kisses, licks, and wriggles.
Klaus was so inexperienced and so aroused that in moments Dorian had him gasping with delightful frustration. He soon took pity on his lover and himself, quickly and simply.
Capturing Klaus's roar of completion with an open-mouthed kiss, Dorian held and stroked him until he calmed, and kissed him back. When he finally pulled back to look at the beautiful face, green eyes looked back at him in wonder. Then he moved, dumping Dorian on his side, facing him. "You did nothing I could not do by myself. Why was it like nothing I have experienced before?"
"Because you are not by yourself anymore, Klaus," Dorian told him. "I will always be with you now, even if we are not physically together."
"Romantic nonsense," Klaus said warningly.
"Not this time," said Dorian. "You'll see." He began to trail kisses over Klaus's brow, down his nose, across his cheeks, down to his strong jaw, scratching teeth against the beard stubble.
Klaus responded by stroking down Dorian's back to cup his arse, kneading it. Dorian knew it was one of his best features, and was pleased that his lover's hands were at last exploring previously forbidden territory. He sat back against the pressure, and bent to suckle at Klaus's left nipple.
That produced a gasp of surprise. Dorian smiled against the sweet, salty flesh, and gently grazed it with his teeth, producing more involuntary sounds from his previously untouched love.
Just how untouched was he? Dorian knew Klaus was certainly a virgin when it came to sex with another man, but he was reacting with such wonder to simple touches ....
"Klaus?"
"Hmmm?"
"You've made love before, yes?"
"I have had sex. With women." There was humor in his lover's voice as he added, "You did not think I was a virgin at my age, I hope?"
"No, I didn't," Dorian said, romantic as the notion might be of being Klaus's first ever. But there would be plenty of firsts between them.
He sat back on his heels, and Klaus put an arm beneath his head so he could look up at him. "What are you thinking?" Klaus asked suspiciously.
"That -- I want you to make love to me. To be inside me," Dorian told him.
Klaus almost managed to keep his mask of calmness in place as he said, "I am aware that it is possible, although I confess I do not understand how."
"Would you like to do it? There are many other ways to make love."
"Of course I would like to do it," said Klaus. "I ... have thought of it often," he admitted.
Oh, Love, have you any idea what it means to me that you are willing to tell me that?
"But in reality," Klaus continued, "how is it possible without hurting you? I ... have seen men who have been ... assaulted, hardly able to recover."
"Oh, my love, that is rape. Man or woman, the true suffering is in the mind and heart, long after the body has healed. But what you and I will do is make love. I want it as much as you do," probably more, "and you have no desire to hurt me anymore. Do you?"
"No," said Klaus. "I ... want to give you pleasure."
"You do that just by being here. Let me get some of the oil from the storage room - that way it doesn't matter when we get around to it. We'll be prepared."
It took just long enough for Dorian to be shivering by the time he returned to find Klaus zipping two sides of the square formed by the sleeping bags together. His love took the oil from him and set it down, then guided Dorian into their love nest and took him in his arms to warm him.
He was slowly sorting out Klaus's ideas of what was too "foppish." Clearly, the beautifully romantic gesture of warming Dorian in his arms was not. He tucked his head under Klaus's chin and snuggled close. No protests.
It seemed to be flirtatiousness, coquettishness, that Klaus objected to - attitudes unnecessary to Dorian's happiness. He was very, very happy right now, and took his time to savor it.
So it was Klaus who initiated the next step in their lovemaking, rolling atop Dorian, who laughed and pulled his lover's face down for a kiss, then squirmed onto his stomach. "Take your time," he said, resting his face on his folded arms. "And use plenty of oil."
Klaus did - on Dorian's shoulders. Oiled hands stroked and kneaded him, moved down his back, fingers working down either side of his spine. It was wonderful. "Where did you learn to do that?" he asked blissfully.
"You don't do my work for years without having to have your back adjusted," Klaus replied. "I thought it might prove more ... interesting ... with the oil."
"Mmmmm," Dorian agreed, choking down joyful laughter. Klaus truly had no idea how romantic his instincts were, and Dorian was not about to inform him for fear he would stop.
Eventually Klaus worked his way down to Dorian's arse again, carefully exploring. If anything, he was too gentle, obviously afraid of causing pain. "You won't hurt me, Klaus."
"You do not find it ... humiliating?" There was no disapproval in Klaus's tone -- he simply wanted to know.
"How could I? It's you making love to me. If I could wrap you up inside me, hold you safe and warm forever, I would do it. Now don't scold me for having such a ridiculously romantic notion!" he added, concerned that he might break the Major's mood.
But all Klaus said was, "No. I won't."
Under Dorian's guidance, Klaus prepared him thoroughly. Finally, Dorian exulted in feeling the man he loved both within and wrapped around him. It was heaven.
And too quickly over, both of them highly charged after the long foreplay.
But it didn't matter. Klaus was not the kind of lover who rolled off and fell asleep. He carefully turned Dorian to face him, kissed him again, and said regretfully, "We will probably be sorry if we don't clean up before we go to sleep."
Fortunately, they had the pool right there. Leaving the sleeping bag to air out, they bathed in the warm water, washing each other. Then they ate from food they had already prepared, sitting on the edge of the pool with their feet in the warm water.
It was idyllic. Dorian didn't want to move.
Then, "Dorian?"
"Yes, my love?"
"Where did you hide my cigarettes, thief?"
Damn. "Do you really have to start smoking again?" he asked.
"That is not your choice to make, Eroica," Klaus replied.
Dorian rose, and retrieved the two packs from the nearly invisible ledge where he had hidden them.
Klaus took out a cigarette and put it in his mouth, but he did not light it. Then he put it back in the pack. "I may need it more later," he said. "We don't know how long we may yet be here." And he put the cigarettes in his backpack.
Neither of them felt like putting clothes on, so they went back to the sleeping bag and used it for its intended purpose, sleeping in a tangle of arms and legs and hair, and waking to make love yet again, this time more skillfully and less urgently as they grew in their knowledge of one another.
To Dorian's surprised delight, Klaus seemed to have no inhibitions about following his lead, trying for himself whatever the thief did to him, and then inventing his own variations. He loved the gleam in his lover's eyes as he discovered how to set Dorian whimpering in helpless ecstasy.
They did dress, though, to go outside and check once more on the snow blocking their path of descent. It was still there.
"Will you hit me if I say I wish it would never melt?" Dorian asked.
Klaus studied him for a moment, and then replied, deadpan, "For the moment, I seem to have lost my desire to hit you. Whether the truce lasts depends on you."
They scrubbed out the sleeping bag and spread it open to dry in the sunshine, along with their daily laundry, which was getting rather dingy from the lack of proper laundry soap. Then they did the same things they had been doing every day, cooking up more food, exercising, shaving -- but bathing had become a whole new pleasure, and every moment seemed to glow with the simple joy of being together.
The one thing they did not speak of was the future: what would happen when finally the snow melted, and they had to leave their private Shangri-la?
Dorian tried very hard not to think about it, to stay in the moment, but every so often it nagged at the edges of his mind. A Major in NATO could not be openly gay. And if he could not be open about their relationship, once back on his beloved job, would the Major want a relationship at all?
After dinner, Klaus said, "I have been thinking."
Dorian's heart sank, but he determined that if Klaus had come to his senses and wanted to end things, he would not beg, but would face it with dignity. "What have you been thinking?" he asked in as neutral a tone as he could muster.
"What you said -- about wanting to ... wrap me up inside yourself."
"I can't help it, Love. I can't do it, it's just a fantasy, but it's still a valid feeling."
"Ja -- I know this feeling. I also feel it for you. Dorian ... I would like to try it."
Not believing Klaus could mean what immediately leaped to mind, Dorian tried to laugh it off. "I thought you were going to devour me this morning -- I think you have quite a bit of me inside you already."
"Dorian," Klaus said seriously, "do not pretend not to know what I mean. I do not want you as less than my equal in all things."
"It's not a contest," said Dorian. "It's love, and no one should have to do anything he's not comfortable with. In fact, no one should do anything that doesn't simply feel wonderful."
Klaus stared at him, anger and some other emotion warring in his eyes. He took a deep breath as if to say something, thought better of it, and then shook his head. "No. I will not hold back. I will not be a hypocrite with you."
"Klaus, you never have been -- "
"You know I have, even with myself! You saw through it -- you would never have pursued me so determinedly if you had not known I was lying to myself as well as to you -- although why you would want someone so twisted I will never understand. I am far more perverted than you are, Eroica ... but at least I have stopped denying my desires."
The Mosel green eyes looked earnestly at him as Klaus struggled to find words. "I must have seemed like such a fool to you, crying Don't touch me, when you had to know my mind was in the gutter."
"Not the gutter, my love," said Dorian. "The bedroom. And yes, I did hope it meant you secretly desired what you so loudly denied. I feared you could never accept it, though."
"I probably never would have," Klaus admitted, "if I hadn't lost my memory. When I thought we were already lovers ... it felt so right. It is right, no matter how wrong it is."
"It isn't wrong!" Dorian insisted. "Klaus, do you think you are giving in to sin?"
"A lesser sin than many I have witnessed and many I have committed," said Klaus, "but nonetheless a sin."
Dorian sighed. "So this is in for a penny, in for a pound."
Klaus took his hand. "No, that is not it. Dorian, I live by choosing the lesser evil. I am a trained killer. You know that, and it has never frightened you." Again the green eyes studied him. "You, my thief, are the least of the evils that make up my life."
Dorian stared at him, feeling as if his heart had just grown too large to contain in his chest. "I love you," he choked out, knowing how inadequate the words were.
"Then give me what you have always known is my secret desire," said Klaus.
Dorian fought down tears, and tried to pour all the love he felt into the kiss he gave Klaus. In time, perhaps his beloved Major would come to understand that love could never be wrong. For now, he, also, would settle for the least of evils.
He took a very long, careful time preparing Klaus, giving him every opportunity to change his mind.
Dorian's own introduction had been gentle enough, but nevertheless coerced, with a man he had not loved. What he recalled of it now was mostly discomfort, and the humiliation Klaus had feared.
It had taken someone who loved and respected him, years later, to show him true acts of love. Dorian wanted Klaus never to experience sex between them as anything else.
"I love you," he repeated as he hugged Klaus around the waist, sweeping his back with his hair. Then he kissed down his spine, and gently bit each perfect globe of his arse.
"You are trying to consume me again, thief," said Klaus. "It's meant to be my turn."
Dorian was delighted by the humor that emerged from Klaus when he abandoned his repression. The somber mood of moments ago was gone, as Klaus abandoned himself to Dorian's ministrations.
They had just bathed before their dinner. Klaus's skin tasted and smelled fresh and clean -- knowing his fastidiousness, which had continued all through his amnesia, Dorian realized that his love had timed his request. As if it could matter.
Klaus's emotions may have finally relaxed, but his body still held the reflexes of years of repression. Dorian heard the involuntary sharp indrawn breaths that he knew meant discomfort, perhaps pain, felt Klaus repeatedly tense, and then try deliberately to relax.
Yet when Dorian sat back, Klaus's hand came immediately around to grasp his wrist. "Don't stop!"
"Klaus, it doesn't matter. The time will come -- or if it doesn't, I don't care."
"But I care," said Klaus. "I have wanted this for so long ... don't stop now."
So Dorian returned to his massage. As if reassured, Klaus laid his head down on his folded arms and this time did relax completely. Dorian seized the moment.
Klaus gasped, but then went limp again, murmuring, "It is not terrible at all."
Dorian chuckled, and concentrated on moving gently, when he wanted to thrust like some mad rabbit. He prolonged it as long as he could, then when he had caught his breath, he held Klaus and kissed him, trying to pour all his love and gratitude into those simple gestures.
Klaus's arms came about him. "Liebling," he murmured in Dorian's ear, and Dorian's heart melted. He lay quietly with the one he had pursued around the world, who in the end had come to him.
"My love," he whispered in return, nibbling at an earlobe that happened to be in his vicinity, too worn out to do anything more at the moment, too contented to speak further.
As they lay intertwined, breaths slowing to normal, something intruded on their perfect peace -- a vibration, a noise ... a rushing sound --
Klaus raised his head, forcing Dorian to do the same -- and at the same moment they realized what it was.
"The snow has melted," said Klaus. "The pass is no longer blocked."
Thus it was Dorian who was forced to say, "We will have to leave here."
Klaus hugged him close and nodded. "Ja. We must leave in the morning." He kissed Dorian's forehead, and pulled the sleeping bag up around them. "Get some rest. We have a long way to go."
They were up at dawn, cleaning all the utensils they had used from the storage room and carefully replacing them, making sure they left not so much as a cigarette butt to mar the peaceful shrine. When they stopped a moment before the portraits of the sun and moon gods, Dorian looked about, but could catch no glimpse of the Mother goddess he had met ... or imagined.
He remembered what she had told him, and could not help wondering: had he acted in Klaus's best interest or out of his own selfish desire? The Major was little help: he was all military efficiency this morning, preparing to move out.
It was much easier going down than up. Not only was gravity now on their side, but although the mountain air was crisp, the bitter cold they had endured on the ascent was gone. They were able to go faster, but still not rapidly. The trail remained steep and narrow, with many dangerous passages.
They had little breath to talk, but Klaus showed no hesitancy to touch as they worked their way around some of the outcroppings.
And when night fell, they snuggled up together again in the combined sleeping bags, and had "a kiss and a cuddle," as once the sun was gone it was too cold to think of taking their clothes off. Besides, they were so tired that once they were warm and comfortable, sleep claimed them in mere moments.
The second day went much like the first, but at midday on the third, Klaus suddenly stopped, putting his hand to his lips in a gesture of silence, and then pointing downward.
Dorian looked ... and saw movement. An orange safety jacket stood out against the pale spring greenery. In front of it, he made out a purple and tan shape that looked familiar --
"Hualpa!" he whispered to Klaus. "Remember his poncho? It's a search party!"
"Shhh!" Klaus hissed sharply but softly. "We don't know who they are!" And Dorian realized that it could be their enemies, forcing the boy to take them in search of those responsible for spoiling their plans.
So they hid behind some rocks and watched the other party as it moved out of sight, then came back into view at a higher, closer level.
Dorian smiled. "Bonham!" he exclaimed.
"And A!" Klaus added in amazement. "Z, as well! My chief apparently has decided I've taken enough leave time."
Now that they recognized the search party they stood and hallooed to them -- safe to do now that the snow was gone. The men below looked up, and cheered to see them both hale and hearty.
Klaus and Dorian made their way down to their would-be rescuers.
"What are you doing here?" Klaus asked his alphabets.
"It's my fault, Major," said Dorian's loyal Bonham. "With Jones in hospital, I needed help, so I contacted Mr. A here."
"Jonesy!" exclaimed Dorian. "How is he?"
"He'll be fine, but he broke his leg pretty bad in the fall," Bonham explained. "It killed the Nazis -- and when no more bodies showed up in the avalanche that fell two nights ago, we decided to come see if you were alive, or if we'd find your corpses somewhere up here."
"You'd have found mine," said Klaus, "if Eroica hadn't managed to carry me back to the shrine."
Dorian saw the looks of surprise on the faces of the three who understood English. Hualpa simply looked on and smiled.
"Well," said Klaus, "let's not waste daylight talking. We'll tell you what happened when we make camp for the night."
Not all of it, I'll warrant, thought Dorian. Before his own men, what choice did Klaus have but to become the Iron Major once again? He sighed to himself, having hoped for a bit more time out of time before he had to surrender his love to the realities of NATO.
Klaus began issuing orders, which his men obeyed without question. Dorian plodded along, partnered now with Bonham, all the spring gone out of his step. They continued downward, to a good camping place that would see them back in the village the next day.
No longer strung out along the trail, they dropped their packs in a circle around the fire Z started. Dorian and A went to gather firewood, while Bonham started coffee brewing. Returning with an armload of wood, Dorian saw that someone had moved his pack and Klaus's side by side. That was odd, but he made no objection, although he wondered what Klaus would say when he returned from his reconnaissance of the perimeter.
But Klaus merely reported that he saw nothing suspicious, divided the watch for the night to first A, then Z, then himself, and sat down next to Dorian without comment, accepting a plate of beans and a mug of coffee from Bonham with a simple "Thank you."
Dorian felt grateful to be allowed to sit there, and ate the plain fare while Klaus told an abridged version of their adventures.
"We saw you get shot, Major," said Bonham. "I was afraid you'd been killed."
"The bullet grazed me, but I was unconscious for most of a day, and then suffered the effects of concussion. If it hadn't been for Lord Gloria, I would have died."
Mr. A glanced at Dorian, then back at the Major, and ventured, "You do seem to be on, uh, better terms than before."
Klaus looked over at Dorian and actually gave a slight smile. "Yes. We are."
Dorian smiled adoringly at him in return, saw the frown begin, and quickly suppressed the coquettish expression he knew Klaus hated. "We had no choice if we were going to survive," he said. "We had to become comrades in arms."
Klaus choked over the swallow of coffee he had just taken. He covered it with a cough, and said, "Lord Gloria nursed me back to health."
So Klaus was going to recognize him as perhaps a friend, but no more. It was back to "Eroica" and "Lord Gloria" -- could "idiot" and "pervert" be far behind?
Be grateful for what he can give you, Dorian reminded himself. Friendship is better than nothing.
Ah, but not than what he had thought they shared in the mountaintop shrine. It's my fault, he realized. I took advantage of him when he was vulnerable. I should be grateful that he's not threatening to tear me limb from limb.
Nor did Klaus threaten him as he set everyone to work getting ready for the night. "A -- your watch. Z -- fill the canteens, and the coffeepot for morning. Mr. Bonham, will you please prepare what we'll need for a quick breakfast so we can move out at dawn?"
Hualpa watched, smiling, then said something in Quechua, looking from Klaus to Dorian. He held his hands up, palms facing one another, and brought them together.
Klaus reddened, and turned away. "Dorian," he said, "please get some more wood before it's too dark to find any. It's going to get cold during the night."
It certainly is, thought Dorian -- then realized that Klaus had called him by his first name. In front of God and NATO agents. What will he make me pay for that slip?
He went off in search of more wood, staying away until he had as much as he could possibly carry. The wood was far less heavy than his heart as he chided himself, What did you think would happen? That he would give up his whole life, his career, for you? You had a few days of your impossible fantasy -- be grateful.
But the words of the Mother kept ringing in his ears, This time out of time is your cusp, Dorian. If you can come through it selflessly, you will bind your love to you for all eternity. But if you fail, if you act in your own interest instead of his ... then that unity will take many more years to achieve. It may not occur in this lifetime.
He hadn't meant to be selfish. He had really thought he was doing what Klaus desired. He's right that you're an idiot, he told himself. You could cost him everything he has worked his whole life for.
Darkness was closing in. Shouldering his double burden, Dorian returned to the fire.
It had died down to brightly glowing embers. Hualpa was rolled in his bedroll on one side, Z and Bonham in their sleeping bags on the other, and between them ....
Dorian's heart caught in his throat as he saw what Klaus had done. Their two sleeping bags were zipped together as they had arranged them ever since they had begun making love. Klaus was already inside, and as Dorian approached he lifted the flap and said, "Come to bed, Dorian. It's going to be a short night, and it's already getting cold."
Just as if it were the most natural thing in the world for them to sleep together.
Dorian dropped the wood and dived into the warmth of Klaus's embrace.
Klaus had spoken for everyone to hear. Now he said softly to Dorian under the crackling of the fire, "We can't let it end. I don't know how, but somehow we will work it out. I refuse to lose you now."
Dorian fought back the tears he knew his love hated.
But what did he need tears for? He was happy -- so happy he thought he might burst. He tucked his head under his beloved Major's chin, and fell asleep to the rhythm of their combined breathing.
End
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